Times like these...

Packing up home as you know it, leaving family and friends is a monumental change and takes a large degree of courage.  Many people are not up for it and they are happy to stay in the same town, even the same suburb they grew up in and will be content to stay there until their dying days.  Others, need change and get itchy feet if they stay in one place too long.  Then there are those that will go where they need to and where life takes them because they are open to it.  It takes all sorts and I probably find myself somewhere in between the latter types but I do love to head home after being away for a while and immerse myself in all that is too familiar and feel like I never left.  Then... I'm happy to come back to my 'home for now' and feel settled and relieved not to be living out of a suitcase.

I know other expats that haven't been 'home' in 4 years, others that make the annual trip that helps them get through the rest of the year.  Moving from a place like Melbourne, Australia to Doha, Qatar or anywhere in the Middle East for that matter, offers such a diverse environmental and culture change.  It's so much bigger than any sea or tree change people speak of back home and I don't think anyone can prepare themselves for it or be completely confident that they will cope with all that it entails. It offers a wealth of unique opportunities and new experiences that will never pass you in that other part of the world you call 'home'.  It will be filled with fun times and new friends and you will be feeling content and secure in your new 'home', living life as we know it, but then something will bite you on the backside, out of nowhere, when you are least expecting it...

When homesickness sets in, it sets in! Sometimes its a song on the radio that reminds you of someone special, sometimes it's a craving for one of the many little sacrifices you willingly make when you pack up your bags, but that 'little' sacrifice felt rather major on this particular day.  Sometimes your mind wonders back onto what it was doing and the feeling passes, other times, it lingers for days and you find yourself in a slump that no amount of sunshine can seem to bring you out of.  The cloud does eventually pass.

Our first trip as a couple, which we referred to as 'our adventure', I found it much easier to leave home.  Packing your bags is one thing but packing up the grandchildren is heart wrenching. No airport good bye compares to those when you have grandparents saying good bye to their little treasure. Skype is a fantastic thing but on screen kisses and imaginary cuddles don't compare to the real thing.  Thinking about what is being missed, whilst you go off to another country and do what you have to do....and that is to live your life the best way you know how, at that moment.

This week my mum, who is in her late 60's and lives alone, had surgery on her legs which meant that she was going to be out of action and would need assistance with most things.  We had discussed prior, whether or not I would come home and both agreed that she would cope with a little help from others.  I have been speaking with her each day and I couldn't be more regretful that I didn't come home to be with her.  She is there, in pain, I'm here and I can't help. 

When we spoke through the week, she told me she had some sad news. I hate hearing those words.   One of our cousins lost her husband, a father of four, suddenly and unexpectedly. I have a soft spot for these kids who I used to babysit when I was about 15.  They are all grown up now but I don't see them any other way than little tackers and I was so sad to hear they had lost their much loved Dad.  We haven't seen each other for a long time but Facebook keeps us in touch.  I'm here and a Facebook message where words are so difficult at times like this just felt wrong.  If I were home, there would be something more I could do.

We have lost family and close friends unexpectedly during our time away and there's something different to grieving from afar, when you are not at home surrounded by family and friends nor are you there to comfort those that need it. You may go home for a short period and this can help you with closure but grief hits you in waves long beyond that short visit.  You can't call in to that person just to see how they are doing, when you find your mind wondering or remembering, but you wish you could.

Times like these, the only place you want to be is home.

And then there are times where you are at 'home', driving down Camberwell Road and something very familiar catches your eye, it brings on a little smile and you start to think about what's waiting for you at 'home', wherever that may be.

Is a trade fair a fair trade? Part 2

So, silly me went back for seconds! I had my eye on a Turkish glass lamp and thought I'd take Miss B along to 'the market' as she had been calling it.
BIG mistake!  We got stuck in the queue going into the car park, Land Cruisers jumping gutters speeding across sand to park here there and everywhere, cutting in to the queue and before I knew it, I couldn't change my mind, we were stuck in it!  WTF was I thinking?!  I managed to stay calm (this lamp is worth it!) and once we got into the carpark managed to get a park rather quickly.  It was my decision to take the pram, just in case Miss B decided she had had enough and it was also a way of keeping her close and not having a nervous break down should my child go missing. When I saw how busy it was, I headed straight for the light stand but realised I needed 'cash only' so dashed back out to the foyer to the ATMs.  Another 'WTF was I thinking?' moment. The queue for cash was at least 10-15 long so I headed down to another thinking it may not be as busy, 200mtrs later, it wasn't as busy so I lined up in front of about 5 local women.  Not so bad, I'm thinking.  Then suddenly I was surrounded by ladies in abayas, the civilised queue was no longer anywhere to be seen, it was every woman for herself.  Honestly, I really don't cope very well with this.  I assume it's a cultural difference that the courteous 'wait your turn' doesn't usually exist here and it always catches me off guard whether I'm driving or at the supermarket cashier.  It would be my normal reaction, regardless of where I am in the world, under these circumstances to politely (and I emphasize politely) remind those jumping the queue that 'there is a queue!' To me, it's simply courtesy, we all have somewhere to be, we all need money, several of us had prams (kids do make a difference, their patience doesn't last as long as ours) so keep it civilised and we'll all eventually get what we want.  But, I was seriously out numbered and really didn't feel all that comfortable.  I felt like the queue jumpers were not jumping their fellow country women, they were jumping me as if I didn't have the right.  I thought about what would happen if I said anything?  I imagined an absolute scene of yelling in Arabic, all directed at me.  Was it worth it? Absolutely not.  Every so often you are reminded that you are in a country that is not your own and you are made aware of it.  This was one of those moments. I let a couple of women jump and then thankfully and surprisingly one woman let me in to which I looked her in the eye and said a sincere and polite 'Shukrun' (thank you in Arabic). 

So we find our way to the light stand, NOOOOO!  The lamp is gone! SOLD!  The vendor offers to make up another one, simply choose your 5 shades and come back in 20mins.  I do this and when I arrive back I notice the vendor playing around with the shadeless lamp, it's not working.  Plugging it in to other sockets, investigating the cord, cutting the cord and attaching another with electrical tape.  This is not giving me a good feeling.  Fire hazard comes to mind.  Miss B is in the background telling me she wants to go home and she's hungry.  I am assured that the lamp is fine, his partner makes all of these lights and he's an electrician.  Yeah right?!  Call Mr A who suggests feeling the tape and ditching the purchase if its hot, otherwise go ahead.  Cord feels cool so I open my wallet.  The guy is wrapping the lamp and I start wondering how the heck am I going to carry this 1.5mt high lamp with 5 hanging globes, push a pram over the desert to get to the car?  I'm not!  I'm good but not that good.  Vendor tells me there's porters around, just grab one of them and offers to mind the lamp whilst I go search. Thanks for that! I thought porters would work like they do at the airport, there's a desk you go to, they load your luggage and take it to the car and load it on, you tip and they head back to their desk.... not at the Fair!  You can hire a porter to walk around behind you whilst you shop to carry your 1 bag or 20 bags or you can simply get him to stand outside and simply mind you bag or bags.  I had no chance of finding a porter.  These guys were in high demand!
Sometimes, things are so easy, other times incredibly hard.  Mr A and I have a motto to 'work smart, not hard' and today this was just getting too hard so I walked out.  My lamp is probably still sitting there waiting for me but I'm sorry you weren't worth it.  We didn't leave empty handed though....

"A mumma and a bubba" to add to Miss B's animal collection

Is a trade fair a fair trade?

Today was a good day.  I love it when I'm pleasantly surprised by something.  Over the past week, I drove past the Doha Exhibition Centre numerous times on my way to here and there and noticed signs indicating it was hosting a 'Trade Fair'.  I thought this was a 'trade fair' ie for retail owners and wholesalers to showcase but Mr A informed me last night it was open to the public.  On Twitter it was described as 'Souk Waqif in A/C'... that was sounding like a decent way to spend the morning.  So with a free morning ie no pool, nail or hair appointments (cos that's what I do all week?!), I drove by on the nursery run to check out whether it was open and how the car parking situation was going.  I am very easily put off doing things here in Doha as a direct result of traffic and car parking.  On a normal evening or weekend, the shopping centre car parks can resemble a Westfield on Christmas Eve, you just don't do it!  As soon as you get in it, you find yourself thinking 'WTF was I thinking?!'  At 10am, it was looking good, not too crowded, poll position, unfortunately in the sun, which meant that I was going to be getting into a 55 degree car when I was finished but hopefully it was going to be worth it. 

I couldn't believe how civilised and organised it was.  All the Persian carpets up one end, all the food (dates etc) down the other and everything else in between. Let's get one thing straight, this place is HUGE and this Fair fully occupied the entire space.  Just a tad overwhelming as I walked through the 'free entry' (another thing I was surprised about) and I was sure I wouldn't make it through every aisle, surely the hagglers would start to peeve me off or this huge space would be just filled with crap. I was pleasantly surprised, it was like Souk Waqif in A/C but better!  Obviously the Exhibition Centre doesn't have the same cultural feel as a wonder through the alleyways of Souk Waqif, so I'm speaking from a product perspective.  There were traders from China, Vietnam, Thailand, Morocco, Egypt, Lebanon, Jordan, Rawanda, South Africa, India, Pakistan, in addition to many of the Gulf States, selling everything from African artifacts, hand painted Moroccan dishes, dress jewellery, pj's, silk kaftans, fabric, South East Asian craftwork, bedspreads, fake handbags, hair straighteners and just to remind you that you are in the Middle East, Abaya's and plenty of silver and gold tea sets!

It's last day is tomorrow.  The jury is out on whether I would give it a go any time after 4pm but if that's the only time you can get there and you don't mind a fair trade, put your haggling thongs on get down there! Be prepared to haggle, otherwise take an Arabic speaking friend, like the Souks, I'm sure traders see Westerners with a sign on our forehead saying 'start with your highest price and add a bit more & see if we are stupid enough to pay it.  I don't mind a challenge and it's not very often I am pleasantly surprised here in Doha.

As for my purchases, today I went a little light on, not over doing it but I have my eye on a couple of larger pieces that I'm going to sleep on and discuss with Mr A and possibly head back tomorrow at 10am.   Miss B was rather pleased with her little presents when I picked her up from nursery!

I really need to get to Africa!  On the bucket list!

I'm so excited (from one Pointer Sister to another!)

It was pointed out to me yesterday that what I perhaps consider mundane or obvious may not be the case for those that have recently touched down on the these desert and dusty shores.  It's amazing the knowledge you start taking for granted, so I started thinking back to the 'finds' I found that have simply made my life easier. All great finds in Doha come through word of mouth and I'm over a year into our second stint but I still keep discovering new little treasures (if that's what you could call them?). 

As an expat, you will find yourself getting very excited about the little things, for example a grocery shop can be bliss but it can also be a nightmare involving 2-3 supermarkets just to get prune juice (cos you really need that here!), Vegemite (for the Aussies), Ribena, Weetbix, or a decent advocado/mango.  On this a word of warning, if you like a good dinner party, don't leave your shop until the last minute.  This has been known to put me in tears on a Thursday afternoon and politely calling my guests on the Friday and asking them to go and find some rocket for my salad!  Food and produce have improved dramatically since our last trip in 2005-2007.  The Centre, Mega Mart (near Ramada, aka 'mega wallet') was a saviour and probably still is, they stock the best range of baking goods, organics and condiments and their meat and fish is generally consistent.  However, since Spinneys (The Mall & The Pearl) entered the market, they have a little competition, although for a dinner party I will still always take a trip to Mega Wallet.  I'm also absolutely wrapt with Carrefour Market at Lagoona for the day to day.  Their fruit and vegies are just as good as Mega Mart and the drive is much more convenient. Meat is generally good, Aussie lamb and beef, but being a smaller store they do run out of options so morning shops are best.

Ok, so something for the mums out there.  Obviously kids spend a lot more time indoors here whether it be due to the heat or the dust so how do you keep little ones entertained when stuck in 4 walls.  When I discovered these two stores, it was a little sad at how excited I was.  Yes that excitement has died down but I keep going back for more.  We don't have an Officeworks, Roit Store or Deans Art here in Doha. Nothing close to it.  The first place you hear of is Al Jarir Bookstore, in the heart of the busiest intersection of town with 10 carparks, oh it's fun, make sure you try it, any time or the day or evening, it's the same traffic jam that can be more hassle that it's worth.  Make sure you are having a good day, it may change once you hit the car park but you will be in calmer spirits to handle the experience.  If that's not what you are looking for, try one of these.

Side note:  I was going to post a pic of each of these because that makes it so much easier when you are driving along with a Land Cruiser up your bum, flashing his high beams at you, when your lost or trying to find some shop with an Arabic name that means nothing BUT... the look of these shops wouldn't make for a very attractive photo on my blog :) so please accept my directions and a pic of my recent purchases! Eco Safe Finger Paint and poster paint (30QR each) @Al Qayyim



Al Qayyim Book Store - Al Markhiya (Between McDonalds and Burger King) - park out the front, go in the morning or mid afternoon, they close between 12.45pm and 4ish?, but if you haven't realised, everywhere in Doha becomes a traffic jam from 6-7pm onwards and this place would be no exception.  The sign is large above the shop so you can't really miss it.  Upstairs they sell kids tables, toys (crappy Disney characters stuff) but head down stairs to their 'stationery'.  It's not large by all means but you will find plenty of art and craft supplies for kids including a large range of 'SES Creative', Danish made non toxic paints, playdo and crafty things for boys and girls (ie beading, plaster moulds, stamp sets etc) and a decent range of stickers and general stationery.  If you consider yourself a bit of an 'Artist' they have professional paint supplies and all sizes of canvas for you to paint lovely shades of desert sand and bougainvillea.

Al Ranaq Stationery - There are several stores around Doha.  I have personally been to the one at the Souks (opposite the material souk) and the one behind the KFC (opposite Al Ahli).  I'm sorry for the lack of addresses but this is the way it works here in Doha.  If you need any more specific information on this location, just make a comment and I will be more specific.  In fact I could do a map but I don't have time to do that today. :)  Al Ranaq (I'll call this one KFC) is predominantly stationery, great for card, paper, stickers, gift bags, glue, paint & brushes.  Al Ranaq (Souk) is not so much stationery but I think has the worlds largest supply of scrunchies (you know the hair things from the 80's) and hair clips.  If you are into craft, this is for you.  Feathers, ribbons, wool, cross stitch frames, decorative bits and pieces and sequins, oh the sequins!  Al Ranaq stores are CHEAP!  I stock up on all my poster paper, stickers, ribbon, glue etc and walk out with bag loads, all for under QR100 ($25-$30).  I have never walked out of Officeworks with that sort of receipt!

Watch this space for more enlightenment soon and if you are a newbie and you don't know where to buy Prune Juice, drop me a comment and I'll try and help you out, that's if I haven't purchased all the bottles sitting on the shelf!  I may give you one of mine?

Hang in there...

I have mentioned in previous posts that I'm still rather rusty on the blogging front.  In addition to getting content up and published, I'm still playing around with look and feel so hang in there whilst I do a little window dressing, then change my mind and fumble my way through the functionality of Blogger, Instagram, Pic Monkey, HTML, Photoshop, InDesign.... As Mr A says "It's a jungle out there!"  
If you are in the same boat as I am and need a few ideas, check out www.fatmumslim.com.au Not only has this quickly become one of my favourite blogs, Chantelle is a fantastic resource and offers some really handy tips on many aspects of social media. It's free and she does this out of the goodness of her heart.  A few of her posts have been invaluable in fast tracking my learning curve.

Ok, it's late, I'm tired and I really need to catch up on some zzz's!  

#photoadayjuly

So, why do this?  What's the point?  Seriously, don't you have more important things to be doing than taking random photos and for who/what?  Well, for the same reason I write a blog, it's an outlet, it's fun, it forces me to see something creative and fun in some of the ordinary but necessary things I do each day.  It takes 5minutes... well when I get the hang of instagram and sharing across multiple platforms and multiple technologies it will be a 5 minute thing but at the moment though, I'm averaging about 15, still a minor part of my day.  What I'm really enjoying about getting into Twitter, Instagram and my blog is what I'm learning about social media. Gosh how quickly this train moves! Big picture, I have to keep up with it.  I'm enjoying the community that has embraced it and it really does make you feel connected.  Connected to expats here in the Middle East and beyond, connected to other women back at home in Oz, many of which I don't know but each with their own interesting stories to tell and connected to my like-minded friend who has the ability to ease the homesickness and bring it on all at the same time.
I can say having this little 'unpaid' job has really filled a void.  I love being a mother and I love the fact that I am in a fortunate position that I can be at home with my little girl and be there for her when she needs it.  I love the fact that the bulk of my worry is about her and doesn't have to be balanced with a boss.  I do go back and forth on this and previous posts clearly show this, but this week, I'm very happy that I have something for me, an outlet when it suits me and when I need it, it's there, without pressure, in between wash loads, bed making, nursery runs, food shops, dinners, baths, arts and crafts.  Thank you for finding me and stop worrying what other people think!

 Day 1. #Self Portrait - The very unglamorous nursery run!

Day 2.  #Busy - I'm not a morning person, always running late and the school lunchbox is just another thing to do in the morning rush.

Day 3. # Best part of my day - unexpected rest and cuddle time on the couch.  This lasted about an hour.  These moments don't come along very often and you have to grab them when you can.

Day 4.  #Fun - An impromptu tickle on the bed after several attempts to put shoes on....If you can't beat her, join her!

Day 5.  #On the floor - My pedicure, a nice contrast on our Maid's room tiles, quite retro now that I've taken notice but these tiles are often a topic of conversation.  This part of the world like to ensure their 'help' don't forget their place.  By picking the most 'out of place' tiles, aims to keep them in their place......... We use this room as a store room.

Day 6.  #Chair - PJ wearing bus driver, making the most of her chairs!

Ok, so I have fallen of the wagon this week.  I knew this would happen but I'm playing catch up!  I think this is OK?! Is this cheating?

Day 7 #Garden -  We live in the desert and this week we have dust storms so this is as close as I'm getting to some garden life.... Miss B & I getting creative.

Day 8 #Lunch - Leftovers!  Yes, I'm a little ashamed of it but it was really GOOD! 

Day 9 #BIG - This is the view from my balcony and the villa currently being built.  It's not just big, it's HUGE! There is a mini bus parked out the front to put it into perspective.

Day 10 - Fav colour - I always go back and forth on this but generally I'm always drawn to metalics and earthy tones. My recently purchased cushions for the couch.

Day 11 - Letter - Miss B & I made this for her Dadda so that she could put all of her 'love letters' to Dadda in during the day and he could collect them after work each night.

Oh boy, I'm looking at these now and not only did I fall of the wagon on productivity, the creativity is a little shaky too!  Sorry for wasting your eye energy! Now I am starting to question why am I doing this! :)
See you tomorrow with a little TEXTURE!

You say tomato, I say tomato...

Ok, so you know it's been too long between blogs when you forget your user id and password, not just one of them, both!

I still haven't really figured out the direction of this blog but it seems to be moving towards personal snippets of this and that.  It's an outlet for me and I'm not going to fuss too much over whether I think others would find a particular topic really interesting or not.  It is, what it is!

The last couple of days I've had Miss B at home from nursery as she's had hand, foot and mouth virus (nothing to do with Mad Cow!) and after her bout of conjunctivitis the previous week, the smart thing to do was to infect myself. In an attempt to control our disease ridden household, I was like a broken record telling Miss B, 'don't touch your eyes', 'wash your hands' etc. To get out of the house I took her with me to do a food shop.  We're in the fruit and vegie section when Miss B starts picking up fruit, dropping it on the floor, you know the drill.  Normally I make a game of it and if she feels like she's 'helping' me, we get by without too many issues but today, I just wanted to get in and out.  First time, "Miss B, PLEASE don't touch the fruit".... Miss B: "But why?" I explain, as I do every other time, that other people would like to buy it and if you drop it and bruise it they won't be happy when they get it home and they have to throw it out.  Moving along, by this stage, I'm not using 'please' anymore, "Miss B, how many times do I have to tell you to stop touching the fruit." We're at the tomatoes and an older gentleman has a little smile and tells me politely that they all have to find their way somehow.  Hmm, I acknowledge him but now feel like a bad mother and the guilt sets in for getting on her case and not letting her just be a kid.... this lasts for about 10 seconds.  As I wondered down to the cheeses, I imagined whether he would have the same opinion if I had said "Well sir, she has hand foot & mouth, would you like it too or are you satisfied with just pesticides?  Touching your tomatoes should do the trick but if you want to make sure of it, I could always get her to sneeze on them?!"
I'm in two minds now that I'm not so sleep deprived and a little less irritable as to whether to nag or not but I will definitely be washing my fruit and vegies a little more diligently.

Today was Miss B's last day of nursery.  I don't think she understands the finality of this.  Dropping her off this morning was a little like the first day of nursery for me, but nothing unusual for her.  Miss B making her usual late rock star entrance after a big kiss and cuddle at the door but as I walked out, I was sad.  Sad that she is growing up too quickly, sad that we won't be coming back to this beautiful villa filled with colour, warmth and happiness, sad that big school won't have the same familiarity and family feel, and sad because I think she's too young for the coldness of school corridors.  I remember dropping her off and feeling empty during her first week but once I could see how much she thrived on the socialisation and stimulation and how warm and caring her teachers were, I was relieved and very content.  I can't see myself feeling this come September. In Doha, the Kindergarten equivalent forms part of the private school system where many schools host 3-4 year olds up to senior students.  The school day starts at 7.30am, Monday-Friday. My baby girl will be just 4, I'd like one more year.